Friday 7 March 2014

Musings on February...and its superfluous letter R!!

February has blown itself out! Maybe it was angry at its inability to rid itself of that superfluous letter R it carries in its name!  Well it certainly Huffed n Puffed n Blew n Raged n A-Hey & A-Ho & Blew the Man Doon!....not quite in biblical proportions it has to be said, not quite 40 days n 40 nights but it certainly came doon! But all to no avail - For that pesky letter R is there still ; useless, abandoned....yet resolutely hangin' on!  Somewhat like the S t O n E D H o l Y B l o G G e r ! !


But here it is March and Ahv shaken myself loose of the jailhouse clutches of the Stoned Holy Duvet and lifted myself, like the dancing, icing sugar white Snowdrop, into the Bourgeoning, Tumescent, Sap Rising and Bracing airs of Springtime! Maybe, Punxsutawney Phil style, I'll quickly scamper back doon ma steaming burrow....but the important thing is, just like our Groundhog Necromancer, Ahv made it through another winter....and can feel the pulse quicken imperceptibly as the Stoned Holy Corpuscles throw off their Wintry torpor and deliver a rush of Righteously Indignant Red Blood Cells into the Stoned Holy Mainline!!! Yip, there's Grousin' n Grouchin to be done!! Lemme hear ya say Hell, Yeah!


Yes, I could, like the recidivist felon, sink back into familiar behavioural loops and in the manner of re-offending find myself thinking on every dreary year wasted, on this, my Tragical History Tour through livin', as being but another dreary tread towards the cold, loamy inevitability of the grave......but methinks not......leastways not today! Yes, I could ruminate further on my ongoing failure to prosper in this World of Fools, where Man's Inhumanity to Man never fails, on consideration, to dampen the spirits and point the way doon Desolation Row! For of course, our record regarding our fellow creatures is woeful - those fashioned from Space Dust and such matter as the Infinite Universe itself is comprised off, much as we are ourselves!! And if we were to broaden our ambit somewhat and include our 4-legged compatriots, who share with us this Cerulean Blue Space Bubble on which we all hurtle through the Unceasing Emptiness of all Creation, it won't be long before we must surely reach the conclusion that Humanosity is a Failed Genetic Dead End Street and the better it will be for Planet Earth for the bombs to drop swiftly and give the cockroaches n bugs a chance at doing something better!! And to think, there's some that think the Empathetic Impulse is hot-wired into us from birth!! Hmmmmm!

But today the Litany of Human Failures will trouble my tender, Stoned Holy Heart Shaped Box but little ; I shall gaze upon the lucent blue haze that girds our goodly Earth and think on snowdrops joyfully nodding neath the creaking boughs of Birch.......I shall glory in the green tips of wild garlic that soon will rise and festoon the banks of singing streams and dappled wooded lanes and fill the air with the juice of a vast army of stinking, pale green bulblets........and thence bluebells will come, profligate in their heady-scented sensuality........who could resist? Not I! I surrender!! Surely, does it not make you wonder, though : Why is there all this killing goin' on in the world when the bees are buzzing and the little birds are singing in the trees!!